Emo girl =.=
Truthfully i wonder how you are now. I wonder if you're happy, but what the heck of course you must be happy, of course she makes you happy. I saw her, by the way. I was just talking about you both and then i saw her. We smiled.
You know how awkward it was? but.
I hate you.
But still, i want to say something. i just don't want it to be like that. The reasons why you got angry like that, i don't know, maybe you're right. I am a selfish bitch. You can call me that if you want.
I want to have a fight with you so that i can hate you. Because if we remain unspoken, nothing will be done, i'll still wonder why you got so angry, and you'll continue feeling that you're right when you're wrong. No, wait. I am always wrong. You're right.
It may seem like that. You never hear me out.
Today wasn't such a good day, but it was still bearable. Mommy's laptop's internet connection didn't work. Now i don't have so much time cause i am using her work thingy laptop.
My family (Geni Family) are worried about me since i am getting sick these few days, and i got to say that i am. But it's no surprise for me, i am always sick. I am always like this. I don't know if i really need to worry about anything.
Some people asked me, if i am more active in Myspace or in my blog. I said "Neither" and it's true. I am more active in SSF. cause, i can pretend there. I can be someone else. I can be what i want to be. Because i am fake. Every little piece of me. Lifeless, dull... But yeah, honestly i have to say i am pretty DULL and LIFELESS whenever i am writing in my blog.
I am not always like this, so this is pretty rare. At school i am the 'hyper' type, i can smile and laugh like nothing is wrong. When i am with my family, i have to do everything the right way, even if i try, i don't think i can be all smiley and crazy, unless my cousins and aunties and uncles are with me, because they're smiley and crazy too.
When i am alone, i can be both. I am overly dramatic (especially when i am in front of the mirror), and i act as though i am what i want to be. When i am alone, i think properly if i should do it my way, or whatever my parents say. I chose to do whatever my parents say.
It's not easy to be me. It's not easy to pretend as if you're happy and healthy all the time. It's not easy.
Friday
Friday, July 24, 2009
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